Wednesday, June 15, 2016


Dateline: Nine months into the passing of a spouse

Some days are harder than others.  I miss dialogue and discussion. I feel the emptiness of the heart and the mind in dealing with the everyday things of personal life, and I miss the dialogue on the effect and affect of global events.

What to eat is simple when two are involved. It’s a discussion, a statement of likes and wants and sharing the process. It is difficult when cooking for one. One potato, a few beans, a small entre of beef, chicken or fish and then eating alone can be challenging or introspective by connecting to the collective spirit within the ONENESS of all things.

I often force myself to set the table so as not to become accustomed to a tray, a counter or a passing sandwich.

I’ve noticed the clean-up for one is just as involved as the clean-up for two or a few more. Dwelling on that enthuses the mundanity of life. If I embrace it, I give it power, and it becomes the albatross of loss and holds me to sadness.

Is there a lesson here for friends and couples and families? Yes, but it’s not one of sadness or loneliness. The passage of a loved-one is an unfortunate part of life and one that should be experienced with positive memory, appreciation of what you did share, and an acknowledgment from the other-side to over-ride the finite emptiness of loss and fill the void with infinite expectations, adventures, and whatever is offered in the singular experience of a new life.

If I do that, if we do that, cheers abound from just the other side of nowhere.

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